This just in: the 2-cent bill

Well we’ve been successful in our recent effort to do away with coins. We were sick of only having our former 40, and 20 cent bills as well as the 4 and 2 cent coins. Oh no. Now we’ve got a 4 and 2 cent bill to replace those pesky coins. Our economy must be growing! Now when I go to the bank for my stipend of about 85 dollars, usually paid in 20 cent bills which makes a total of 440 bills. Now I may be able to get paid in 2 cent bills—a grand total of 4,400 bills! I think we’re trying to prove something to someone by replacing perfectly good coins with ones that look strikingly like euros, but for now I’m just keeping my fingers crossed at the bank window for the big bills!